So when I close my eyes and try to rest it never works. My mind just starts thinking so hard! Maybe an wicked fairy godmother cursed me with this at birth.
So maybe I am more of a leaf than a flower. Not that flowers are better than leaves, or leaves than flowers. Both are needed in this world. But then - switch the criteria and the leaves may actually be the flowers or the flowers the leaves. Or maybe some people are flowery leaves and others are leafy flowers. Oh well.
Random thought: Maybe love is the breath of life.
I took a random personality test today that bases your personality on the acronym OCEAN - openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. I am apparently very open and sensitive to beauty and also very neurotic. I am quite conscientious and quite agreeable but not very extraverted. Generally these five qualities are good qualities...except for neuroticism, which kind of tortures your life - and I had the most of that. Maybe all this explains why in the 8 or 9 months I have lived here I have actually taken the time to indulge and sit on the stone benches on the lovely lawn in front of my dorm less than 10 times, even if I appreciate it every time I walk by it, I feel worried about bugs and mosquitoes and also having to talk to people. Not that it's such a big deal. But I wonder - I picked this place to live a lot because of this lovely patch of green outside which is so rare in metropolitan Bangkok...
So - that was a lovely moment to sit outside. It was right in between the time the bugs switch reigns...the flies had retired but the mosquitoes had not yet taken up their night shift...
...I really should go and sit outside more often.
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