I feel terribly stressed, completely tired and freaked out. I had a terrible dream early this morning. Then I felt better later, and then worse again.

I think I have not been interacting with people enough. The problem with this is that if I get a streak of solitude, then I really don't want to see anyone anymore, lonely as I feel...and much as I may need it.

It seems like people are busy right now...and the good friends I can really talk with are so far away...ah, cursed globalization...so that a good deal of my close friendships are on the Internet - and I rather wish it weren't that way because I should have more of a life in the REAL world. But they are very special friends...I value their friendship so much. But then, they are also busy and having fun visiting other friends, attending social gatherings... Also I work alone at my office most of the day because my boss is gone for summer break...the maid comes in the morning and then she's gone by lunch because there's hardly anything to do. I think I'm slowly languishing. I have another month of "solitude". I guess some of it can be a good thing...sometimes we need time "away" but if I get enough time "away" then I almost don't want to see anyone anymore.

This is why this blog is filled up this month and probably will continue thus in the month to come! I need someone to "talk" to.

I feel a bit burned out too...there are all these little requests to do this and that, and they add up. :P And I lack focus at work because there is no guidance and I'm not good at pushing myself to do stuff with no motivation from outer sources. I guess it is time to learn!

A lot of the stuff people ask me to do is enjoyable stuff, but when it starts to add up it's just too much. :P :P :P And if I'm not doing too well in the first place...and also I can't seem to help stressing about it...even when I tell myself it's not a big deal and I don't have to do it perfectly...

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